Things I fucking hate

- Inspirational blogs

third post today dgaf

If I die someone better play this at my fucking funeral, because it is legit my favourite song of all time, potentially.

On a different note

I love this shirt/sweater combination,
both are Zambesi

GAHHH

My doc martens just broke, like front of the sole is completely disattached from the leather upper.
Goodbye my babies, we lasted 4 years together, parting with you is going to be like parting from my child, except I hate children so probably very different.
RIP

You know those people who are like "me and my boyfriend broke up but I wish him the best"

They are fucking liars. Like, fuck that. I hope he loses his job, gains a significant amount of weight, is lonely for 10+ years, unsuccessful, and finds himself in five years crying in bed about the fact that he lost me and that I'm a lot happier than him.

I wish them the worst in life, and if that makes me a total bitch, thats okay with me

So last night/this morning (3am, whatever work it out)

I can this great idea for a porn movie and here it is:

Mary Antoinette look-a-like chick being slutty and whatever else porn stars do.

Are you all ready for the title?????
Let them eat cock

Its significantly less funny now that I've typed it out and people will assume I usually get thoughts like that, but whatever, you're all jealous of my creative mind

Cool phone conversations with our internet provider

Woman at Slingshot: Hi, Wesley? Is that who I'm speaking to? We recieved an email from you earlier and were just following that up. We tried to contact you earlier today about it

Me: Oh yeah! Hi, yeah its me. I heard the phone ring but I was masturb-DISTRACTED